I had my transplant!! Oct 14, 2014!!

Well the day finally came......the waiting was not easy.....allow me to backtrack....

Since last I wrote a LOT has happened!
After being listed in Hawaii and waiting what seemed like forever (3 years)  getting sicker and sicker I finally moved back to the mainland to live with Miranda and Jeff, as it was clear that I was no longer able to live on my own. This was April 2014.

The kids built a little "apartment" for me in their home.....a living room, bedroom and a bathroom......I shared their kitchen......and  my (at the time) future son in law is a chef so I certainly got to eat well!!
Im not quite sure how they put up with me as my mind was increasingly becoming foggy with encephalopathy. My ammonia level kept rising and my judgement and thoughts were very muffled. I was in and out of the hospital and began having increased hallucinations. Separating reality from fiction became very difficult. Running my company became impossible. Miranda took over that as well as my care.

I went to the Austin doctor who told me I had only months to live (3 years prior) and when he saw me he was quite surprised that I was alive.....suffice to say I asked him never again to give such bad news when clearly he could be mistaken.....he said my illness was very hard to gauge and sometimes can last a lot longer than expected......I told him he really ruined the last 3 years of my life causing intense worry and fear and major depression that I am still battling with. Its not easy to hear those words.....every day you worry it is your last.....you push people away....you become a recluse.....a hermit.....you only want to be alone. To this day I struggle with this.

Miranda took me to San Antonio for my transplant evaluation in September 2014 and upon seeing the coordinator asked the question "Is it true that Im too small to be her donor?" and the coordinator replied "not at all! Its not your body size that matters its your liver mass that matters" And my 25 year old daughter stood up and said "please test me right away!"

And they did....immediately......first they called my insurance company to get clearance.....5 minutes later she was in the lab getting 23 files of blood drawn......I was in shock.....mainly crying.....secretly hoping she was not a match but begging God that she would be. I know that sounds crazy. My mind was crazy. Thoughts were hard to keep in order.

I had other potential donors. My son offered, my sister offered.....both had same blood type....but for many years I said no....I didn't want to risk anyone else's life for me.....but at this time I had gotten so sick that I wasn't able to really consider the consequences of my decision to say yes to any of them. So I said yes to them all.

All three were matches. All three.

Miranda was the perfect match. Miranda said to me that she wanted to be the one since it seemed fitting to her that she had seen me through all the bad stuff throughout the years that she wanted to be the one to end all the misery and save my life.

They did a zillion tests to be sure she was healthy enough to undergo such a major surgery where they would section away 60% of her liver and remove the right lobe to donate to me. My baby girl had never been sick a day in her life....no surgeries....nothing really to speak of. They asked her if she ever at least got heartburn....when she said yes the transplant surgeon said "Well thank God! You're the healthiest potential donor we have seen!"

And the rest is quite a blur......weeks went by while they determined if I could have the surgery and if she could have the surgery. They day we got the green light is a day I vividly recall.....mixed with every emotion possible, I realized there could be a light at the end of the long tunnel I had lived in for so many years I couldn't even remember before it all started.

Our surgery was scheduled for a few weeks later.....Oct 14, 2014.

As the time creeped closer and closer Miranda was terrified but adamant to go through with this to save my life. How does a person even process this is their mind when they are clear headed let alone with ammonia filled fog? The living liver donor surgery is one of the biggest most complicated surges there is.....Miranda was told her liver would grow back to approximately 80-90% of the size it was. Those were the statistics.

And we were told in the past year they had performed 55 living transplants. We THOUGHT they meant living liver but they meant mainly kidney and when we arrived at the hospital to tour the transplant acute care  units the day before our surgery the charge nurse came over to us and said with all the glee in her eyes! We are SO excited to meet you! You are our number 4 living liver donor!!

We looked at each other and said NUMBER 4?? What happened to 55? She said oh that number includes all the kidney transplants this year. So we asked "You're telling me in this past year this center has only done 3 living liver transplants????'

The fear in Miranda's eyes I will never forget.  I was too sick to really comprehend it all but still I remember seeing how scared she was. Crazy that I was thinking that it was silly that she was scared.

To this day I feel such incredible guilt that I allowed my child to undergo such a major surgery for me. I firmly believe God made me completely unaware so I would finally say yes and have my life saving transplant.

They admitted me that night and Miranda went with Jeff to the hotel to come back at 5 am the next morning.

I don't believe I slept at all. Kelly stayed with me.

In the morning they wheeled me to the OR prep area already pretty drugged. They wheeled my daughter to me and I don't think Ive ever been more excited! Miranda acted excited too but later on I learned that she had been crying terrified of what was happening. She asked Jeff not to take her to me until she had control of her emotions so I wouldn't see her so scared and crying.

Can I say that again? My 25 year old daughter was about to undergo this terrifying surgery but her main concern was that I not see that she was scared. How did I ever get so lucky to have this person in my life? Miranda is one of a kind. A selfless angel that cared more about me that morning than herself.

I don't remember anything after that until I woke up a few days later. I do know the first thing I said was Wheres Miranda? Hows Miranda?

My family tell me they kept reassuring me that Miranda was fine but I didn't believe them until they wheeled her in to see me. She was alive and in a lot of pain but smiled at me anyway. I remember being in terrible pain and wishing I didn't still feel sick but in my case I still felt sick.

My road to recovery was long and hard. I suffered so many complications, procedures and more surgeries before  I finally got well. Miranda had one complication. An infection that they cleared up pretty quickly. She had to have a drain put in and removing that was pretty painful for her.

Today Miranda is completely healed with a straight line scar on her abdomen. She is also a married woman as of a month ago and I got to be at her wedding! Healthy! They call her SUPER DONOR since her liver grew back to 120% of its original size and she is now an advocate for the transplant center speaking to potential donors telling the the good the bad and the ugly!  They even put her name on the wall on the 9th floor family waiting area....a leaf tribute on an artists tree of life.  They held a ceremony that we went to honoring Miranda and several other donors. It was one of the proudest days of my life.

I have God, Miranda and the team at University Health Science Center Transplant Department in San Antonio and my family to thank for my recovery. My sisters and Mom stayed with me at the hospital or nearby at a hotel. When they finally let me go home, my sister Dawn allowed me to stay at her house where she took very good care of me. My dad flew in to help with my recovery. After six weeks at Dawns I was able to go back home to Miranda's house right after Thanksgiving!

I have Jeffrey to thank for taking amazing care of his finace' while she recovered after surgery. That man took off work for WEEKS to stay at home with her. I believe he is just as proud of Miranda as I am. She's a hero. My hero.

The holidays were memorable......the entire family was there for Thanksgiving and it held more meaning for me than any other.

In March of 2015 I moved out of Miranda's to my own apartment! In June of 2015 Miranda's wedding took place! My daughter Shannon and two grandchildren Lianna and Jax flew in and stayed with me for two weeks!

Now I get to anticipate Miranda and Jeffs first child! I hope every day that I get the call saying "Mom Im pregnant!!!" is it real? Am I really healthy? Am I going to be here to see Miranda have her babies?

Today is July 9, 2015 and I feel healthy!

I write this because I believe it is an important lesson to teach others....an issue that most people probably never give a second thought to.

Did you ever think about who gets a handicapped permit? The first thing that most likely comes to your mind is someone in a wheelchair right?....common assumption. Thats what I used to think too...or very old people....people with crutches or walkers....not people who LOOK perfectly healthy....

Its the "but you don't LOOK sick " misconception....allow me to explain.

Tonight I went to Lianna's elementary school for her Big HUGE Halloween Fair....it was PACKED and the cars were lined up for what looked to me like miles and miles and miles down the road. My first thought was to turn round, go back home, lay back down on my couch and shoot Shannon a text to say "maybe next year....."

But then I remembered, Lianna will only be 5 once and I don't want to miss these things. I am smart enough to know that I might not live to see her be six. I WANTED to see her and her friends and buy them some shave ice and cake walk....and take LOTS of pictures! So I did it...the thing I almost NEVER do.

I was given a handicapped permit when my doctor suggested there could be times that I might need to use it.....tonight was one of those nights. I rarely if EVER use this permit. So rarely that I didn't remember I even had it at first. 

As I get sicker and closer to transplant there are many times I am completely exhausted. More times then not I am too tired to go out....to stay awake late...to do most things that other people take for granted, things I miss more then anything.

I parked my car, put the permit on the windshield and as I was getting out of the car I was greeted with a very angry look by someone who must work at the school. She gave me a look like "how dare you park in that spot when you so obviously don't need to??". I WANTED to shout at her something like "are YOU waiting for a transplant? Are YOU too sick to walk a mile to come see YOUR grandaughter at her Halloween fair??"

But I didnt. Because I understood. I dont LOOK sick....and you know what? That is one thing I thank God for every day.....its bad enough that I AM sick, but if I looked sick it would be worse. I decided it was a better plan to come home and write about it...if ONE person is educated I will be happy.

Please always think long and hard before you make  a complete stranger feel bad by your condescending looks. You don't know what that person might be dealing with. Not all sick people are in wheelchairs or using walkers or crutches....some of us are just in end stage liver disease and even walking to the garage to get in our car sometimes wipe us out.

(ps there were four other spots still left unused even when I left so I did not take away anyone else's spot who others might think need it more than me. If I didn't NEED it tonight, i would never have used it. I know my daughters, my mom can vouch for this. They have seen me refuse to use it many many times)

Thank you for taking the time to read this

Evaluation week!

So....right after Cyrca finally approved the insurance for the evaluation it was scheduled! Me and  my girls flew off  to Honolulu! This was a grueling week....lots of tests, injections, meetings, information, more tests, doctor appts....we spent probably 8 hrs a day at Queens Hospital Transplant Center. It was not easy on any of us but the girls made me proud again as they took notes and asked lots of questions, even made jokes when they could tell that was what I needed !

So far I am very impressed with the sincerity,kindness and competence of the entire staff at Queens! They were all very thorough and could tell they were very pleased that the insurance company finally approved this week of testings! They ALL received Mauis Aware bracelets and it was so cool to see them wearing them all week long!

Reck Navarro and his team at Cyrca/SHOTT could not have been more helpful. Jane Lee and the entire staff at Queens Transplant Center made us feel important, welcome and at home the entire time.

Transplant evaluation can be confusing and demanding. All appts are scheduled one after the next.

First day was with the head in patient Psychiatrist, Dr Serghi, who was wonderful and called me an inspiration and told my girls they should be proud of "who their mom is". He had read over my files very carefully and called me the "poster woman for everything that is wrong with insurance in this country today"! He admired the tenacity I have and the advocacy of my own health. He went on to tell us all that "it only needs a liver" (inside joke there!) and told us all I was 100% cleared for transplant from his perspective. He said he could tell during our hour and a half that I had a very clear and realistic grasp for my situation, what is involved and yet to come. He also went on to say he would be sure that the meds I am given at the time will NOT be what they have in the past and make some of the adverse reactions terrible for me, he said the doctors of the past should be ashamed at the drugs they had used and should have known better.
Whew! One down!

Next was Jane Lee , Transplant Coordinator who spent a GREAT deal of time with us going over everything to expect. This woman KNOWS her job and does it well. She provided us with her phone number , email address and assured us we could call or email at any time and she would always get right back to us.

The Cardiologist was really super nice (Dr Terekubo) and ran a bunch of icky tests but cleared me immediately! He took the time to remind the girls to STOP SMOKING!

The Team consists of Tx Financial, Pharmacy, Social Worker, Cryca reps, Dietician....so many people.....the Cyrca Rep, Lisa,  wanted us to know that Reck and Beverly told her "Wait till you meet her...her face lights up when she smiles!" This almost made me cry after giving Reck such a brutal time during the past year. I am now very sure he was doing everything in his power to get things approved but the medical director had the final say, it was NOT in his hands.

We learned soooo much...the costs involved are STAGGERING! Surgery alone is 300K.....Procurement of the organ is another 120K (RECIPIENTS pay NOT the donor or their family), Annual lab and prescriptons for life are approx 41K per year. Evaluation process is a min of 10K, lodging and transport and food is another 3-5k....tests tests tests.....the costs involved are just one after the next...NO ONE could do this without insurance....

We learned once "that call" comes in it is a total of 18 hrs max for the organ to be harvested to the point that it is put in my body. I have ONE hour to answer their calls and make a decision. They have three numbers to reach me. They keep the donor alive for as long as possible to allow patient to get to Center, prep and wheeled into surgery. They no longer do the mercedes cut...now it is more like a c section.

Miranda will not have time to get to Honolulu before i go into surgery but she will be there as soon as I wake up. Shannon will be there with me as they put me under ....Thank God!) I would hate to be alone during this time.

Presently there are 22 ppl on the Hawaii transplant list....two are inactive leaving only 20...of those 20 only approx 8 have same blood type as me. These are good odds.

On to the Heptologist....Dr Tsai is wonderful....he squeezed me in and I am now under his care (THANK GOD!) He changed my meds already and was extremely helpful!

Next was Dental....yuck....two deep cavities and a deep cleaning and I was cleared! No fun....

Ultra sound was not easy to see....it is so obvious even to the untrained eye....always is hard to see.
Cat-scans, stress tests, chest xray, 23 viles of labs drawn from my port.

Finally the last appt was with Dr Linda Wong the transplant surgeon....she was quick, thorough and made it clear that as soon as all the test results come in the team would meet about me and make a decision to list me or not list me. The only thing that would preclude me from being listed is if they find cancer anywhere except my liver.

So on to the colonoscopy and pap here on Maui.....wish me luck....noooooo cancer please nooooo cancer....

More to follow!
Whew!

Change here I come!

Life is funny. So many different kinds of people in this world. I come across a whole wide range of personalities every day.

One of the things I learn on a daily basis is about Karma. I truly believe that what you put out into our universe comes back to you. When you are negative, negative things happen. When you are positive , positive things is your reward.

Im working really hard at staying positive. Some days are easier then others. I try to be kind to people and I try even harder to help as many people as I can. It makes me curious when sometimes the more you do for certain people that the more they expect. And sometimes without any appreciation at all. No one likes to be taken advantage of or taken for granted. And I am learning that I REALLY dislike being treated that way.

If I start to become stricter and more cautious about how I conduct business, it is  to avoid this happening any longer.  Im pretty tired of being a babysitter to so many in my life. Its hard enough managing my own problems and dealing with my own issues that adding on so many others neediness is draining the life out of me. I clean up after so many every day that I wonder who's life am I living here??

I think there are many times that I go WAY over and above the call of duty and then I find myself complaining about it....who is to blame for that? ME! If I continue to allow it, I will never have any type of peace and balance in my life. Helping needy children is one thing and there is great glory and satisfaction in paying it forward...helping people who are just too damn lazy to do it themselves or expect everything to be done for them for free is just obnoxious and stupid.

Now I am not saying that I plan to stop helping and doing for others....I wouldn't be me and I couldn't live a life like that, but I refuse to be taken advantage of any longer. And the time given to me is MINE, not anyone elses. MINE. 

I won't tolerate lying. I CERTAINLYwill not tolerate meanness. Not from my family, friends , coworkers ...no one....I will NOT  be told what to do. ("Ask" all you want, but do NOT demand it or expect it)  I will not cater to the "me, me , me , me , me, me" people of this world anymore! 

I also will not be made to feel guilty anymore. Guilty is a complete waste of energy....especially when you have nothing to be guilty about! 

I WILL begin to put a cap on hours I put in and start taking better care of myself. My grandmother used to always say to me God helps those who help themselves. I guess it is time to start helping myself. I need to eat healthier, exersize, work less, play more, join some type of groups that are not music or health related.....and start making the most out of the time I have here on Earth. 

.

In other words I plan to start showing MYSELF respect! :)

If there is one thing missing from my life its joy.....I want my job and my bliss...and I want to get healthy, have my surgery and get on with the life I was supposed to be living. Sick of being the sick one.  Sick of spending every waking hour working on someone elses bliss! (or rather, 55 other people's bliss!) LOL

Thanks for listening to me ramble as I am knee deep in SXSW crap.....yes I am....its called the last volunteer week of my life! hahaha

Until next time.....

This one is NOT going to be pretty...well most of it anyway!

So today is the big day! The day the Transplant Center gets to resubmit me to Circa....I spoke to them on Tuesday when she said she had ONE form that my pcp needed to sign and fax back to her and as long as she got that she was good to go to fax it all....the insurance has approved me evaluation  and now all I need is for Circa to give it to their medical director to give the green light for my evaluation! Yay right? NOPE! Why you ask???

Cause the dumb-ass that is my PCP on Maui has not filled out, signed nor faxed the form....in fact when I called to check on the status today, his assistant told me she cant even FIND the form! UGH! The incompetence is staggering......

Well, I guess it was my last straw because I yelled at this poor girl and told her to call Shawna at Transplant at Queens TODAY, get that form TODAY, get it filled out signed and faxed TODAY and call me to let me know it is done....she said as quietly as a mouse "ok" I even had to give her the phone number and name to call!

Now do I even remotely believe this will happen today? Of course not! But I can assure you of this much, if it doesn't I will be on the phone with the medical board reporting this and demanding changes! I am so freaking tired of this run around. Dammit Im sick....I need help...I need a transplant....I deserve at LEAST an opportunity to be listed for one dont I??
On a nicer note I received this email yesterday....made me cry.....

(I have bleeped out certain peoples names and work places since that would not be nice to share...)


"Dear Tammy,

Hi!  I just wanted to let you know what an encouragement you have been to me.  You are such an example of strength.  

I met you about a year and a half ago while I worked for a man who had several companies, ______.  At the time, when I visited with you (I worked in an independent contractor capacity as his Office Manager at the time), you peaked my interest about the music industry and your work with it.  I absolutely loved what I did but had thought of the prospect of having my own company.  I loved the fact that you traveled and could still conduct your business in another state (I was born in Hawaii - so that was pretty awesome)!   Anyway, since then, I have opened up a company with 2 other partners, producing fireworks displays and other special effects.  I did say, I absolutely loved the industry that I was working in and never in a million years would I have thought I would be doing this, but I certainly needed to pursue it.

After that, I continued to follow up with what was being done with the Austin Boston concert, ________

Well, the main reason that I am emailing is because I came across your blog and had followed your story for a while.  I have continued to pray for you and wanted to share that whether you know it or not, you have made an impact on people that you probably aren't even aware of and quite possibly in ways that you never figured on.

You were a delight at the time I met you and I believe that you have touched many lives.  Keep on believing!  There is purpose in all that you do.

If I ever come across a band that needs a talent agent, I will send them your way.

Thanks again!

T____ W_____"

Thank so so much for brightening my day! What a wonderful letter.....makes me realize that no matter how hard things seem to get, there ARE people paying attention and in my corner....and to know that I have impacted someones life to make a huge change and take a risk and a chance to find their happiness makes me feel GREAT!

Will let you all know what happens next!

Thanks for listening!

T

Austin Bound!

Well, I decided since things are moving along at a snails pace here on Maui I have no reason not to fly to Austin this Tuesday! Whats the worse thing that can happy? Ill swell up on the plane....ok, I can take my lasix...or......the insurance company  will finally call with good news that an evaluation is finally approved to be  scheduled?

Well GREAT but if they DO,  I have no dilutions  thinking that even if they do call on Wednesday that a full evaluation can be scheduled and planned with in three weeks so I think Im pretty safe coming back March 19th. Not to mention once the insurance company approves the eval, then the state Circa needs to put it before THEIR medical director and that person needs to approve it.....THEN they need to get the approval to my primary care doctor and he needs to contact the tx center with a referral to get the eval scheduled! Im thinking this will take another 4-6 months if Im lucky!

It has been a long wait. And according to Dr. Poreddys calculations in Austin,  I should be dead by now anyway! It was March 2011 that he said I had several months to a year at best without the transplant...now while he was correct in his assuming I would get sicker he has NOT been correct in timing my demise! It is a full year now and as far as Im concerned, I'm still alive! I think I might be just too mean to die! Or too stubborn anyway! Nno one will tell me when its over until Im ready to say its over and Im not! I have WAY too much to do here!

I have Lianna whom I adore that needs me to be in her life as long as possible! I have my daughters who I love so much and make me proud every day that I want to spend as much time with as possible! I have a business that I love that needs me....AND the latest news is I have just had a meeting with a company who has asked me to partner with them to put on BIG concerts here in Hawaii! Maui needs some great entertainment and I love doing those! So, there is a lot to live for.
Not to mention that soulmate is out there just waiting for me to get healthy so we can find each other! LOLOLOL

So, it is off to Austin to spend time with Miranda and jeff! And see my sisters! And go to SXSW and Cody Jasper's Cd Release at Antone's! And Chuggin' Monkey's 10 year anniversary party!

But I tell you this...Im not afraid to die....I know when I do there are so many people that I will be seeing! Like Jeremy! One day ....one day.....just not today.....

The latest...its been a while...

It's been a long time since I blogged about anything. A lot has happened since. First the Transplant Center in Hawaii closed it;s doors along with the entire hospital.

This news threw me into quite a depression. What would I do NOW? Still no approval for Transplant evaluation , still jumping through hoops with the insurance companies.....argh...and now no transplant center anyway....

Fast forward to this past week. I had planned a trip to Austin but got pretty sick so the flight was cancelled and instead a trip to Honolulu to Dr. Linda Wong was booked. She is a transplant surgeon here in Hawaii. So this past Friday I went...alone , which sucked, but I went.....her news was not great.

She told me that while they were doing everything in their power to get this pushed through, that the insurance company simply does not want to pay and that they were looking for any reason to deny me. She said the transplant fund that I was told to raise might very well count against me with the insurance since the only insurance I qualified for was state insurance. She went on to say that if I was homeless, or in jail it would be approved immediately but since I am a productive, working citizen who earns her own living, pays her bills and her taxes I might not only be deinied yet again for an evaluation but they might completely cancel my insurance! What will I do THEN? Dr. Wong told me that 45 pages of medical records and labs were sent off to the state once again on the 23rd and we needed to wait to hear from them because without an approval, her hands are tied. She ordered more labs.

So Saturday morning I get my mail and low and behold,  there are my recertification papers for the state insurance. I copied my bank statements and mailed it off with a letter pleading with them not to drop me due to the transplant fund that I will need post tranpslant in order to help pay out of pocket expenses.

On MOnday I went for lab work. I had to go to two different clinics and after 7 pokes and 6 technicians they STILL could not complete all of my lab work, they said my veins are just gone.....so they suggested a picc line be inserted up to my heart.

On Tuesday my results come in....Dr. Wong called and said I have gone from a MELD score of 13/14 to a 16/17 and that my bili rubin is 4.1 which is higher then it ever has been and my amonia level is still almost 100. She agreed that it is time to insert that porta cath and said to tell Dr Granada to be sure to send these most recent labs to the state.

10 min later Dr Granada calls. he had gotten my labs. To make a long story short he put in a referral for the picc line, is calling Dr. Wong about doing another liver biopsy, added some more drugs, and SAYS he is sending off the latest labs to the state. Now this man has most times NOT done the things he said and was supposed to do so I guess it will again be my job to push him....call and remind....Leslie in his office and I have become quite close at this point!

I might have made a few mistakes....I called the Governer's office, Congresswoman's office, insurance company and my case worker at the state to beg them to help keep my insurance in tact. I am thinking today that maybe I should not have rocked the boat that maybe the case worker would read my note and push through the insurance anyway, but I guess i will be finding out.

The ABC show The Revolution wants to do a show on me, my case, my cause.....Miranda had written to them a while back and they called her yesterday a few times.....apparently they might even come to Maui....not sure if I am up for something like this but spreading the word is very important on Organ Donor Awareness and the poor health care in this country....also Fran and Anton Cosmo (Of the band Boston) are willing to come on the show too to speak about it since Fran's brother Ralph had a lung transplant and is doing great!

Shannon has decided to put her  Hair Salon apprenticeship on hold to help me (and spend more time with Lianna) saying she never again wants me to fly to Honolulu alone,  and Miranda is willing to fly here at any time to come stay with me to help. This makes me feel so loved. I hate being a burden on my kids. I wish I could blink my eyes and have this all behind me (and them).

I started juicing after Shan encouraged me and I went to her herbalist Jackie from Maui Herbs......it cant hurt right? I bought the Jack LaLane Juicer......its a pain to clean it all after you juice but Im getting used to it and once a day I go to Rodeo Store and buy one of theirs.....for me everything tastes better when someone else prepares it! LOL

MY spirits have not been broken yet. I am a fighter and while I get down in the dumps at times I ALWAYS get back up and forge ahead! I WILL beat this thing.....or die trying! :)

My new outlook and MY soulmate search! :)

Since my biopsy came back NO  cancer I have a different outlook on things!

Its time to begin living again!

I am so sick of being "the sick one". Im sick of gaining weight due to depression and thinking in the back of my mind "Well, who cares cause  who will ever want ME again anyway??"

Why not? Am I the ONLY person in this world not worthy of finding a soulmate? Come on now! that is just stupid right? There has to be someone out there looking for someone like me! I mean there are trillions of ppl in this word aren't there??

Once I have my surgery, my life will be my own again and I have a bit  to offer, don't I? Im thinking if there are people who find each other every day there has to be someone out there for me.  Im not stupid.....I'm not OLD and shriveled up and ugly! lol (am I??) I work hard and dont need anyone to support me.....whats not l=to like? LOLOLOL

So my new project is this.....concentrate on building my business, getting in shape  and finding a soulmate! If you already know him could you please be so kind and point him in my direction? lol Maybe he is saying the same things I am...maybe he is thinking does EVERYONE else get to have someone but me?

Here is what he looks like, in case you are gonna join in the big search......lol
He is a lot like me......... a hard worker and sometimes doesn't realize how much  time that goes by  when he gets his head up out of  "work-mode".  He has little time to meet someone but is always hoping that special person will just bump into him in the supermarket or gas station or a night club (the only places he has had time lately to go to!)

He loves to travel. He is sooooo funny and can laugh at himself first! He is sarcastic and will make fun of ME all the time too!. He is very good looking (LOL)

He is loyal and not looking for a bikini clad 18 yr old...he is looking for a grownup! He loves live music (a MUST) and he doesn't have a jealous bone in his body. He will have respect for my crazy job! He might be my age (or at least in the vacinity of my age) but he thinks and acts much younger (same as I do!) He's FUN! And he must love sushi and not like Indian or Mexican food....(kidding!)

He must NOT be on his 12th marraige (sorry but  if you cant get it right by 11th time Im thinking you're a lost cause and its IS you!)

Let me know if you've seen him around!

Ok. That. Is. All.
:-)

Let's talk about something else today......

Im going to try and go a full week without even discussing my health or doctor appts or anything like that! Wish me luck cause it seems I have lived, eaten and breathed this for the last 6 months! Time to go back to life as I knew it for a while.....

So "music land" is going well...only one more arrest in the past week by a musician.........Dave Burleigh (National comedian) is coming to Austin and San Antonio in October so that is good news! I saw him on Maui and HAD to get him booked at some of my clubs in Austin!

I have been trying to route a Kevin Chalfant tour (Journey, The Storm) and a Voice of Rock Radio tour as well....amazing talent in that band! Go to:
www.voiceofrockradio.com
and see for yourself......

then there is alway Anton and Fran Cosmo with their Boston show wanting many more dates......I think if I begin to really focus on my job again I will feel better!

Wish me luck as I STOP being the "sick one" for a bit! :)

Im moving Sept 15th to a two bedroom condo here on Maui.....now I will have room for guests as they come visit.....it has been HARD to find a reasonably priced place......finally a great location and complex Im happy about this!

More and pictures  later!

follow up on yesterday

Turns out I do need a biopsy....nothing is ever simple and easy for me....nothing ....shuld happen this week some time....need Dr Nimnuts to handle referrals for it which is NEVER an easy task here but I do have an appt with him today at 5 pm so I will HAND him her report marked IMMEDIATLY and hope he handles it today......he's not the brightest bulb in the pack.

More tomorrow.....

Another day another battle....

Life certainly is never dull..well, MY life anyway! Yesterday I had a GREAT doctor visit.....the office was like a serene bedroom complete with candles and really cool decorations...I immediately flt at ease.......it was my big psyche evaluation with the psychiatrist as part of the transplant evaluation and it  went wonderfully! He said I am the perfect candidate for transplant and  I passed with flying colors .  He told me his report to the center would ge a gleaming one to say the least!

He went on to say I have no mental disorders whatsoever and that I am extremely educated in this process and understand perfectly well the situation I am in....now this is NOT saying Im OK with my situation and he said anyone who says they are would be lying and i can tell you are not...

 I told him that more then depressed about it Im pretty damn pissed off about the whole thing...not because I feel sorry for myself but because I hate the gaping holes in this country's health care system....I told him that I am probably the biggest supporter of donor education he will meet and he loved it! We spke a lot about the problems this country is facing in that department!

He asked me when this road is finished and I am healthy again he wants concert tickets to my next big show here on Maui! LOL DONE! And we also spoke about my son in laws restaurant and he had heard of it and so I gave him a few free appetizer cards for him and his staff and I know he will be going there!

Then today came.....a simple diagnostic mammo...(the one two months ago showed something but they werent concerned ust said Id need a follow up soon)......long story short I have an ultra sound tomorrow morning at 7 am to tell me whatever the radiologist found...never fun when the radioogist walks in the room to tell you "Now I dont want you to worry BUT....'

So of course Im worried, wont sleep tonight.....but Im sure it'll be fine....the universe could not possibl=y be THAT cruel cause if it is indeed cancer, bye bye transplant opportunity....

Life in Tammy's shoes.....brought to you by  SNL's Debbie Downer! heehee
Thanks for reading!

Anything but ordinary

If I had one wish it would be that when I die I will be remembered for being "anything but ordinary"......I don't feel ordinary.....I don't feel special in any way but ordinary, no way.........

Yesterday I went to the beach in the morning and spent about 2 hours enjoying the sun and the ocean and the peace and solitude of Maui...it really is a calming, safe and serene place to live......people are so laid back and nice here.....the beach is the one place I really dont mind doing alone.....in fact I like going alone......i prefer going alone......yesterday was an especially nice day...no winds, calm ocean perfect to swim and paddle board (of course the surfers here aren't happy when its like this but I love it!)

So yesterday I sat on the beach all the while knowing that I had to leave at some point and go to the lab..... I have to go for labs every few weeks now.....usually about 12 viles....5 techs.....6 different sticks....why? Who knows why it is so hard to draw blood from me the last several months, but it is certainly no fun. I used to be able to go in for a quick stick and it was finished....now it is a traumatic experience every single time.

I usually distract myself by texting on the phone. Yesterday one of the techs said 'Please put your phone away" and I said ABSOLUTELY NOT......this helps me get through the torture of this experience. She got it....she nodded....and again she apologized for putting me thru this yet again.....it is certainly not her fault...or the 4 other techs that wander in to "help"

This time they tried to get me to leave after drawing only 3 viles saying maybe I should come back tomorrow for the rest...I said ABSOLUTELY NOT....Im not leaving until we are finished here cause I am NOT spending my tomorrow doing this yet again.....the girls are always so nice to me.....I can see they feel badly every time. And I also see the victory in their eyes when they actually find a vein that works! LOL

I wonder what it must be like to be a lab tech? I wonder how it feels to see sick people all the time. My friend Lisamarie was recently diagnosed with cancer and she is a mere 23 yrs old.....when I think of people who are suffering so much more then i am it makes me feel guilty for complaining.  When I hear about young children suffering from cancer I feel so aweful for them and their families....I do what I can to help support them....I try to arrange a good band for their fundraisers, or donate money to their funds.....I try to spread the word to help them raise more funds because I NOW the expenses involved for a person who is sick. The last thing a sick person or their family needs to worry about is money during such a horrific time....

But its not enough....I still feel sorry for myself....I hate admitting that. I hate that so many years of my life were wasted on being sick....I hate the 5 months have elapsed since I heard the dr say those horrible words and I am STILL not on the list yet....but I am hopeful it will be soon.....I finally have more appts lined up over the next two weeks here on Maui ...all part of the eval process.....so things are actually moving along....not at light speed, more like an injured snail fighting his way across the dessert speed but still moving forward.....

Ok enough ramblings from me for today....its a Saturday  and Im sure Austin has a LOT more  drama in store for me on 6th St (a typlical weekend in my life is at least 3 cancellations, a late band, equipment breaking...you know....the morn...at least 12 texts ranging from GREAT night! to Im gonna shoot myself in the head if I have to hear one more second of this crap! LOLOL.....why did I decide to be in the music business again? Someone quick remind me........ahhh nevermind....Im gonna head to the ocean and read a good book....

The near ENDLESS wait for a simple answer! Am I worthy of at LEAST an evaluation???

So I got to Maui in April 2011 and am STILL waiting in August 2011 for the insurance company to deem me "worthy" of transplant evaluation!! 4 months! Just for the EVALUATION! What's up with THAT? NOT for the actual TRANSPLANT! Nope Im still waiting to be approved for the EVAL!

First, Dr Wells (who is the doctor in charge of Circa Transplant here in Hawaii....decides he needs 3 months of negative results for Alcohol, drugs, nicotine, HIV, Cancer.....) I get it.....this makes sense to me.....Done! April, May and June....done....even sent over July! Do you want August too? Id be happy to oblige!

Next,  he decides wants ALL my records from Baylor X Center  in Dallas.....done! (he already had them but ok....lets see if there are MORE) DONE!

.....last week he asked for records from 15 years ago at Medical Mt Sinai in Manhattan!! Yes I said 15 yrs ago!!

Why is that relevent? Im confused? Isn't it WAY more important to see ALL my records from the past 2-3 yrs? Even 5 yrs....ok lets even go back 10 yrs! But 15 yrs??? Seems to me the dreaded Dr. Wells is looking for anything he can to decide on a big NO......why?? Does the insurance company pay him to deny people? Ive seen movies on this very subject....or am I getting paranoid here??

Why am I not worthy of a Transplant "opportunity" here in the USA? How many OTHER people are going through the same red tape processes that I have gone through for the past year? I was denied in Texas 14, count 'em, FOURTEEN TIMES!!

This country is in serious need for change of policies.....if not to benefit ME to benefit the 1000's of OTHER people waiting for health care....for necessary transplants to save their lives. 1000's die EVERY day waiting....not knowing what to do or who to go to or how to make changes.....

ARGH.....don't take your organs to heaven, heaven knows we need them HERE! Be a donor, give the gift of life!

How you can possibly make more money and have a better experience at your shows on 6th St

Please:

1. Go to the club about a week prior to your gig and hang some posters, While you're there you might as well introduce yourself to the staff and confirm load in times and PA situation.

2.Make sure you know whether or not you need to bring your PA.

3.Make sure I have all of your contact phone information in case of any last minute details.

4.Post bulletins advertising your show on myspace, facebook, websites, and all free online sites available to you (ex: Chronicle, gignaustin.com, do512, ect....)....send texts to your friends...post something funny in your bulletin like"say the word Fartington at my show and I will give you a free sticker!" or "bring in a cowbell and I'll buy you a shot!"

5. Go to Chronicles online site and submit your show free of charge.

6. Post the event on www.Eventful.com

7. Call KLBJ and ask them to put your show on the daily shout out advertising your show at 7:20 pm every day..

8. Bring a tip jar in case the venue doesn't have one. And bring someone to walk it around for you. Preferably a pretty girl! If you can't find anyone ask the cocktail waitress and tip her for doing it for you!

9 Show up early enough to be set up , onstage and hitting that first note at your contracted start time.

10.Gather your merchandise to sell at your show. Koozies, t-shirts, cd's...display them nicely (say in a lit up guitar case)

11. Factor in the sometimes complicated parking situation downtown when deciding on the time you need to arrive.

12. Announce the name of your band often , especially if you have no sign or banner hanging up behind you (which you should have)

13. Bring a mailing list clipboard so you can take down email addresses to let your fans know where and when you'll be playing next.

14. Talk to the audience between songs often! Smile! Laugh! Thank them for being there! Thank the staff!

15. Pay your commission DAY AFTER GIG ON PAYPAL if you want to be rebooked. I'm not a volunteer. I work hard too.

16. Have a good time! It shows and makes a HUGE difference in your performance!

17. Thank the staff nd mention the barstaff by name on the mic.

18. If you sweat perfusely bring a change of shirt!

19. Dont wear flipflops!

20. Shorts are for the beach not the stage

21. Keep your equipment in good repair and bring extra strings since you KNOW one can break!

22. If load in time is 7 and onstage time is 9 / load in at 7 and be onstage at 9.

23. use deodorant

24. dress the part (the visual is as important as the sound)

25. be UPBEAT! remember the audience is out to have a good time and drink and dance...they could care less about being at your "concert" if you get my drift.
26. AND DO NOT DRINK ON THE JOB...IF YOU WORED AT WALMART YOU COULDNT GET DRUNK.....BE A PROFESSIONAL!

As it is happening.....real life Organ Donor situation as it unfolds

I have been screaming to the top of my lungs forever (it seems) abut the need for Organ Donor Education and policy changes in this country....

This example has fallen into my lap quite suddenly and I have my sisters consent to blog about it....thank you Dawn.....I hope it will serve to educate at least one person.....

My sister Dawn is married to Geoff who has a sister named Karen. Karen lives in Maryland......Karen suddenly without any warning whatsoever collapsed the other day .......they took her to the hosptial where it was determined she had a cerebral hemmorage and her famiy was told she had 48 hrs to live......she was immediately placed on life support. (was this possibly what happened to John Ritter...I cant remember)

I have been speaking to Dawn about how Geoff is going, how his family is handling this sad event and I asked Dan "Was karen an Organ Donor" and her response was this" I want to know the same thing but I am afraid to ask"

Turns out the family is quite undertandably upset and dealing with  HUGE loss in their lives. Karen was ony in her early 50's.

A few hours later Dawn called to say she asked the question and was told yes that Karen was a donor and that she has been left on life support as her body is being evaluated for donation.

Now remember not everyone is a candidate for donation....and not all deaths allow for major organ donation.....sudden head trauma/ brain death is one of the deaths that generally work.

The reason I am writing this is to generate the discussion of awareness....have you told your family your wishes? Time of accident or death especially sudden death is NOT the time to discuss this for the very first time....people are way too confused, upset and in grief......

If families are made aware of your wishes and UNOS comes in to ask the question everyone will be well prpared and although thieir grief is still the same, the answer is clear....

Now everything is still being done to evaluate Karen since a small amount of brain activity was just  discovered.......I will keep you posted on  her sad situation.....but a huge thank you to this wonderful person for speaking to her family in advance and letting them know she is an organ donor.....

Hospital Stays Tammy Style

First allow me to say I am an expert of "Hospital Stays 1-0-1"
I believe my family would back me up on my count of approximately 30-40 hospital stays over the last 15 yrs.....probably more.....I stopped counting a long time ago.....

My stories of in hosptial care should be co- written by Miranda and Marissa....as they have both been to almost every one of them.....they tell it best.....starting with the stories of falling asleep midst card games......waxing off eyebrows the day I gt discharged....dyng my hair crazy colors before drugs wear offf.....the stories are endless and we can laugh at them all now......you HAVE to laugh!

Given the condition of my liver and the stent that lives in it, lets just say that heavy drugs are not a really wise choice for me....yet I get to the ER...usually quite upset...usually having nausea, abdominal pain and lately much confusion with high ammonia levels (encepholopathy) so the drugs begin....

First its always the shot of morphine along with phenergan( or zophran) and then adderal  to callm me down....on to the dilauded and ambien.......the rest is quite a blur.....a dribbling, drooling, not so pretty blur...

So guess where I was found in the middle of the night THIS TIME the VERY first night???

Seems I either fell or just decided to go to sleep on the floor! (my vote is for just going to sleep since I had no injurys from any type of "fall")

The charge nurse looked for me at about 1 am and when I wasn't in my bed she assumed I was in the restroom...an hour later she came back and checked the restroom (which was empty) and then spotted my feet sticking out from the far side of the bed. I woke up to five people yelling "Tammy! Dont move! Are you OK? Did you fall???"

The rest again is a big blur.

When I finally became coherant again I discovered I had a person assigned to my bedside 24 hrs a day! Yep! If I got up, she got up...if I went the the restroom she went to the restroom! LOL

My daughters both took care of explaining the the staff and  doctor that someone in my condition cannot and should not be given heavy narcotics as it is not processed through my scarred liver and goes right to my head along with the high levels of ammonia. ONly making matters worse.....

So once again , I remember very little about my hosptial stay this time......except to be shown funny pictures my daughter took and reading some of the embarrassing texts i sent out in my drug crazed frame of mind.

So note to self and all surrounding my bizarre existence......NO NARCOTICS POR FAVOR......

That's 4 days Ill never get back!

me

MY experience with insurance in this country

Well, let's see...where do I begin.....this blog will be about the insurance nightmare that has become my life...and my lovely ex husbands contribution to it all :)

When I was married, we both had good insurance through our jobs...his was through the prison system in Texas (he was a teacher in a jail when we moved to Texas, hence his sparkling personality) and my insurance was through the school district I worked for for 5 yrs.

When I left the school (I had to go out on disability cause I ended up yet again in the hospital) we had a choice....which insurance should we continue to use? We weighed the pros and cons of each and decided that HIS insurance was less expensive in the long run, so that is the one we kept. The specialists were on both of our plans.

Now, please keep in mind that  when you are married for twenty years there is no YOURS or MINE....everything is OURS....unless you live in my ex-husband's head....and THAT trainwreck of a mind will never be figured out by anyone......

As soon as I left him in 2006, we went right to court, and the judge wouldn't grant us a divorce stating she was afraid he would try to cancel my health and life insurance and that he was not allowed to do that since I had such a serious illness....she got a very clear view into his personality when the man would not shut up and rambled on and on and on.....my lawyers just whispered in my ear, do NOT say a word, we are winning big time since he cant shut his mouth.......h sunds like a complete lunatic!!

The judge stopped him finally and  said we would be legally seperated and could live as a divorced couple, but in order to have continuation of health insurance we would revisit the plan in a year.....and then she granted me child support AND alimony (VERY RARE in the state of Texas and you would have thought someone killed his puppy the way he carried on complaining! The judge said to him " it sounds like you"re so much more worried about how you will afford to live, but honestly I'M more worried about HER living at ALL.....ect...) We walked out of that court room with DOUBLE what I asked for....THIS should tell you something about my ex husband!! DOUBLE!!!

So what was the very first thing I did when we left court?

I stopped him on the front steps and told him he didn't need to pay the alimony but to please pay the child support...subsequently, he made ONE payment and never EVER paid again! Dirtbag....and no I didn't take him back to court, I decided I could support my own child and didn't need his money to do it anyway and it simply wasn't worth my time or effort to try to get Texas to MAKE him pay....now I wish I had banked all of that money he owes me and put it in a transplant fund!!

What was the first thing HE did upon leaving court???
He spitefully canceled my life insurance.....keep in mind someone with MY illness is not elidgable for life insurance and the policy we held together was a universal policy  that was completely paid off....we bought it 20 yrs prior when we first got married! Ill never forget the day he called me laughing telling me my life insurance was gone and he knew I could never buy another policy!

Whe I told my daughter, she  flipped out and called him immediately "Thanks DAD.....this didn't hurt MOM, it hurt ME since MOMS insurance was going to ME to handle her funeral expenses and such" His dumbass response was something unintelligable like" oh derr ummmm...." Lets just say not the brightest bulb in the pack. Since 2006  my daughter has seen him maybe 15 times.....when I left him he decided he would hurt ME through HER,,,,,,karma.....I believe in karma and one day he will get his......till then, I don't give him a second thought (unless I am blogging about my past! LOL) And it makes me proud knowing that when my daughter needs something she can and always does come to ME never him cause she knows he wont help......for hr 18th birthday he gave a a card a few days late and in it was a letter explaining why he would not give her a present.....he said he had to think of himself and his retirement and that giving her a present wold interfere with that plan....he said this would help her to grow...then he signed his name with his firt name.....to this day it still breaks my heart for her whenever I think of the things he has done to hurt her......he is an ass.....

Oooops back to my insurance story......
so....
 I ended up in the hospital again and I missed  a court appearance, I was considered a "no show" (I was in the hospital in a freakin COMA for God's Sake during that time!) and he was granted the divorce...different judge...... and the very next thing HE does is........ready???
He quit his job so he would LOSE our health insurance.......he told my daughter this was very funny to him...he said things like "now she has no health insurance either!!"  How many ways can we say CRAZY??

and the word COBRA came into my life.

Anyone know how expensive Cobra is? VERY!

I cobra'd the insurance for as long as I could and moved to Hawaii to be near my daughter and brand new  granddaughter.........when Cobra was gone I applied for insurance in Hawaii and they said yes......Hawaii has it right....they mandate all of the employers give full coverage to their employees that work a min of 20 hrs a week and their state insurance is there for everyone else....they feel in this state that everyone should be covered under insurance. Wouldn't it be nice if the rest of the country followed suit!?

I applied for EVERY private insurance there is and was denied by each and every one of them.....they all said the same thing....you are TOO sick so we do NOT have to take you on......it is what is called a "Catostrophic Clause" in private health insurance companies......

Remember don't ever get TOO sick for insurance....that'll fuck ya every time! lol (not funny )

So, I had since moved back to Texas for my job and kept applying for insurance in the state of Texas....they said no every single time....no....no...declined...declined.....why? They said since I earned more then $800  month that I made too much money......THIS is why people are forced to hide money in this country......not me! Im afraid of the IRS and pay every dime due on my taxes so that was never an option for me.......

 A friend helped me with some information and I  went to Congress and immediatly "Congressional urgency" was placed on my file to try and push through the Texas insurance......The Congressman's office saw the media attention I was getting and decided to help me.....even with his offices help the answer just came quicker.....it was still a no....

they said if i dropped my Hawaii insurance then they might consider it....I said NO WAY IN HELL am I dropping the only insurance I have in the hopes that MAYBE Texas might approve my application after being denied over 14 times!! Even the rep on the phone said she didn't blame me that if it were her she wouldn't drop the only insurance she had. And that was a smart decision because once again I was even turned down for the "buy in" program!!

So the decision was made ....I had to move back to Hawaii and be a full time resident (no longer the dual residency I had held)......this is where I am now, living in Hawaii.....hoping the Hawaii insurance will transfer over to what is called Circa (insurance co that heads transplant in Hawaii) and approve me for Transplant Evaluation.....

The good news? I am living very near  my oldest  daughter and granddaughter....my youngest is moving here in  few weeks to help me through impending evaluation and surgery......and it is gorgeous paradise here every single day.....I am counting my blessings.....

Remember these words.....life is not fair...no one EVER promised you fair....you take what God gives you and you make the best of things.....
Thanks Mom.....you are right about that!

And I taught MY kids these words:
Never be Ordinary.....

My job in music...lol

I get asked a lot how I came to work in the music business.....the story is actually kind of funny and a bit sad as well...

My ex husband decided at age 39 (we are exactly the same age) that he was going to be a "rock star"....of course he didn't bother to  share this information with me....it was only in his head......so he packed us up and sold our house in NY and his business in NY and told us we were going because  I "needed to live near my family in Austin".....little did I know, the REAL reason was because he knew that Austin was the Live Music Capital of the World and he could try his hand at being the next Neil Purt....lol.....to this day in MY head every time I envision him playing those drums I am screaming  "LESS IS MORE, NIMROD, LESS IS MORE" a concept way lost on him I tell you!

So there were were in January of 2011 in Leander Texas in the first house we bought in Texas while we searched for land so we could build our dream house......

That part was wonderful! We built a 4300 sq ft custom built home on 5 acres in Leander Texas and I was the General Contractor! This included a three car garage and a gorgeous wrap around porch......I  searched for and ordered the blue prints, tweeked them to my specs and interviewed and hired everyone from the foundation crew to the framer to the  last  finisher.....and boy was it fun picking out appliances and carpeting and ceramic tiles.....even my light switches, ceiling fans, insulation.....every nail and blade of grass was carefully chosen! lol

I am proud to say while my ex husband showed up each day to drink beer with the workers, I built a house from start to finish in 4 months time! And it was gorgeous! I will forever miss that home ......he swears he helped build the house....I beg to differ! Drinking beer and slowing down every crew is not building a house....its annoying the workers! LOL

But on to the music thing...

So one day as I was sitting on the couch in my beuatiful new home,  wishing my life was different and my ex husband was out in the backyard in the sound studio we built for his latest band to practice in, I decided if I didnt find a way to be part of this music thing, i would end up alone and lonlier then being in that arraige, so I picked up the phone....and I started to get his REALLY bad band booked in some of the premier places in Austin......turns out I was good at this.....

Enter Nuno and Angie......Nuno kept letting me and Angie  rebook this God Aweful Band at his club and came to me one day and said "Tammy, do you know this band is the lowest ringing band ever to play in my club? yet I keep rebooking the cause I like YOU so much! Imagine if you had some real talent.......lets start a production company and you work for me!"

And so I did......Nuno sent a moving truck to move me out of that unhappy marraige and we called the production company "Handshake Productions".......Jo Hell was one of our very first clients.....and then it was Kayla Reeves (who is now touring with the Trans Siberian Orchestra all over the world!) then  Sonny Wolf.....JT Coldfire...the list just goes on and on and on.....Wes Jeans!  Alan Haynes......so many wonderful artists....I learned all about Blues from a guy I was dating at the time by watching the beginnings of Antones DVD and listening to stories as he and Nuno  introduced me to greats like Erik Johnson, Kenny Wayne Sheppard, WC Clark, Hubert Sumlin, Billie Gibbons and the late GREAT Pinetop Perkins...Mr Joe Willie! We even went to Clarksdale Mississippi to see where Pinetop lived......

We went on trips to Nashville to the ICP and I learned every day about music.....

I spent every single day working for Nuno and building that company up......for 6 months......I don't think  I spent one whole day away from Angie and Nuno....they wanted to fill my life with work and friendship so I wouldn't go back to that miserable marraige.....and it worked....they are two of my best friends in the orld and I would do anything for them and thier family.

Eventually Nuno and I decided that I should be off on my own so he could concentrate on his other businesses......like so many before me (and after) Nuno had done his job...he gave me a brand new life...a new beginning.....thank you so much Nuno Vasconsellos.....

So my work was cut out for me......it started off with one club on 6th st.....Blind Pig Pub...Ill never foret Ben was the GM there and asked me to hire all the bands............then the Womacks came into my life through word of mouth from Ben.......and  I took on all of their clubs.....word began to spread on 6th St and today I book many of the clubs on that famous strip in Austin Texas......some weeks juggling 60 shows.......

When I moved to Maui in 2008 I was contacted by an old friend, Sonya  who was working with the Boston guys.....she asked me if i would promote a concert in Hawaii for them...i said NO WAY.....i book bands iI am NOT a concert promoter! So she put me in contact with Anthony Cosmo.....and from that very first phone conversation we became like family and now I tour his band (along with Fran Cosmo) and many others contact me each day.....(oh and their shows here in Hawaii were so much fun to promote!! I plan to bring them back soon!)

My life is never dull and my illness is just a minor bump in the road....I guess I was born to love the drama......if you ever hear me complain about my job,  know in my heart I am loving every second of it.....musicians remind me of those kids in middle school that I worked with for five years....remember the ones I told you about sent down on discipline?? THOSE are the ones I get along with the best! The creative ones who think outside the box.......I admire the talent.....and I love hearing their stories!

One day I hope to get somehow involved in the film industry....now THAT sounds like fun no?

My idea to bring to Congress......who's in?

Sometimes "The Fix" is so simple it gets easily overlooked.....to ME anyway....... it seems simple enough.....

(of course the other side of the coin is someone , or groups of someones, are getting extremely wealthy keeping "The Fix" from being implemented...you tell me)

Ponder these thoughts...

We, in this country, are suffering from a severe and utterly shameful lack of available organs for hundreds of thousands of people that are dying needlessly every year, correct?

Well lets FIX the problem...and here is my idea to make that happen!

Every child born in this country gets issued a birth certificate correct? We've all seen it...the team marches in after your glorious event and hands you a bunch of papers that you, as a responsible parent must fill out expediantely to get your child into "the system"...the social security system...the birth certificate...hell, they even give you that Gerber Life Insurance paperwork so for a mere dollar a month your child can be insured from the moment you walk out of that hospital door!

Everything is centrally computerized.....everything....the government can monitor our whereabouts with little effort....and if a draft was to be reinstituted, they would be completely prepared with the names and ages of all who qualify!

So, why not add some paperwork to that folder? The team can carry two or three extra pcs of paper I am quite sure.........Why not have the team bring in organ donor education pamphlets and give every new set of  proud parents a 30 day window of time to read up on and get educated and make the big decision "Is your child going to be an organ donor??"

Simple.

Why?

Because the time to educate the misinformed American is NOT when their loved one is laying on life support and the family is so grief stricken that the last thing they want to discuss is donating their loved ones organs.....if it were ME and I had never even learned about organ donation and my child was brain dead after a massive auto accident I think I would be so unbelievably upset that I could not possibly make a rational decision....in fact, knowing me, as I do so well, I am quite sure the team would be sent out of my childs' room with such force they would need a week off to recuperate from the experience of the wrath of Tammy........

So here is my answer!

Force every American to become educated. LEARN the facts and make a decision with every child born. You will always have the right to say no at the end of that 30 days  for whatever reason you deem viable....but I PROMISE you, many, many MANY people would choose YES......the shortage in this country would dissappear and like France NO ONE would be dying waiting for a transplant that didn't come to be....the time to educate is duing the happy time..the time when parents can sit together and discuss the pros and cons. The only thing mandated of them is that they make that decision by the end of 30 days and if they do NOT, the decision is made for them.....it gives a window of time for parents to object for whatever reasons they choose after reading the facts.....and I am ALL for people deciding against organ donation if that is indeed an informed , educated decision.....

(I was once told "Tammy if you have never tried Sushi, how can you possibly say you don't like it?? If you TRY the sushi and tell me you don't like the sushi then I will respect your decision and never ask again"......long story short I tried the sushi and it is now my favorite food in the world! Not quite sure how I got to be 44 yrs old never ever having eaten sushi!)

On to the next part of The Fix

Then when the child turns 18 or applies for their drivers licence, it would become their responsibility as an American to make that decision for themselves.

Again, they can decide NO.....but don't you all think this would really spread awareness and educate people on the facts, the needs, the shortage....?? I do.

Remember YOU or YOUR loved one could end up in the situation at any time where THEY are the one that needs a life saving organ......

How many people die that could have gone on to do GREAT things with their lives?

Ok off my soap box......just my idea....seems simple enough to me.....